Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Halloween XXXtravaganza = XXX Disappointment

Hey folks. Things aren't going so well in GGG world. I'm in a fucking fabulous mood, thanks to all my gay porn shenanigans (more on that in a moment), but the bad news is that none of the movies I ordered well over two weeks ago have arrived except The Hole and Love Bites (review on its way). Driller is apparently so sought after that no copies exist (still workin' on it), and meanwhile my copy of Hardgore is floating around in postal space somewhere, not to arrive until early November. Those motherfuckers.

Anyway, I went to the local store to see what I could find, and they had nothing appropriate - I was hoping for Porn of the Dead, which I saw a couple of years ago, or perhaps Belladonna's My Ass Is Haunted, but they had neither. I left with a copy of Married With Children XXX, which is hardly very spooky.

So, basically, my XXXtravaganza is a big XXX disaster. Speaking of which, since I started talking about gay porn, I've had the fewest comments of my blogging career, and lost two followers. Oh, and I received a nasty homophobic comment that I decided not to publish. Well, whaddya know.

So, taking advice from a colleague, I would like to issue the following disclaimer: In spite of the headline for my review of The Hole, reading my review of the movie has not proven to turn people gay in seven days as far as I'm aware.* In addition, commenting on my posts about gay porn is not proven to make you gay, nor make you appear gay to other people, as far as I'm aware.**

With that out of the way, I will be posting my review of the highly acclaimed Love Bites within the next couple of days - see y'all!

* If you read my review of The Hole and you turn gay, GGG takes no responsibility.
** If you comment and turn gay, or people think you're gay, GGG takes no responsibility.

7 comments:

J. Astro said...

A) it sucks having stuff that you pay good money for held up in the mail. I feel for ya.

B) I thought the tag-line to "THE HOLE" was pretty damn funny, as I think I might'a mentioned previous to your review.

C) Don't feel bad about few comments on the review itself. It was a great review of a subject I'm simply not familiar with. I, for my part, am not at all ashamed to admit that I enjoyed the review; it's just not a topic I have any constructive input on. I'll talk about dicks all day, I don't care, and I'm not gay. :D

D) At least there's some sort of "reason" (I use the term loosely) that some prudes have stayed away. I appear to just be simply boring everyone to death over at my blog. ;)

Gore-Gore Girl said...

Thanks for the thoughts Mr. Astro. It's all good.

How many days has it been, by the way? I'm asking all readers to report back after 7 days.

Oh, and you don't bore me - I find your posts highly entertaining when I get time to peruse.

T.L Bugg said...

If people can't read a little bit about gay porn without bolting, then that's their loss. I loved reading all about The Hole, in fact I read the whole thing aloud to a friend of mine.

I assume the followers who left you were male, and these guys need to get a grip. If you watch porn, you watch a lot of cock. I know its not a pleasant thought for some gents, but its true. Sometimes you even get a couple of dongs in the same scene, and that doesn't seem to bother the average porn fan.

Now I'm not saying straight porn fans are gay or anything of that nature, I'm just making a point. Its not like you were asking or demanding anyone watch gay porn. It was an entertaining post on a film that you can choose to watch or not. (I've heard there's a softcore version, and being the fuddy duddy I am, I will watch that version if I can get it.)

So thanks for the review of the Hole. I've been so busy over at The Lair that I barely have time to read, much less comment, but I had to put my 2 cents in here.

Gore-Gore Girl said...

Wow, thank you Mr. Bugg! I honestly wasn't expecting these heartfelt comments in the name of (writing about) gay porn - I'm touched.

I agree - I always say porn is the queerest of all film genres, and the one most anxiously categorized according to sexual preference/object choice (there's no "gay section" on the horror websites...).

Oh, and you told your friend I'm not gay right? I mean, I might watch gay porn, but I'm not gay - just make sure your friend knows I'm not gay, ok?

T.L Bugg said...

Lol I'll make sure and let her know. Now to really separate the men from the boys, you need a crowbar... no no, that's no where I was going. You need to write up some Shemale porn and we'll really see who's paying attention (and to what bits).

X-Ray Specs said...

I don't know, but ever since I made my comment on The Hole, I've been looking through the Lifetime Channel listings to see when The Golden Girls are on :-)

I would make a more serious comment but it appears that Mr. Bugg has already covered everything. Damn, you people that can write and think coherently!!!!!!

Gore-Gore Girl said...

Bugg Man - yes, indeed, good idea! I think something more ambiguous (in terms of levels of "gay contamination") would probably be even more interesting. Straight porn where the men eat cum, the "strap attack" series - these are all subjects I plan on covering. Oh, and tranny porn is sold in the "straight" section these days, so that throws everything into confusion for people who like their boundaries clearly drawn.

Mr. X - you better be careful. According to The Hole Judy Garland is the one to watch out for. Also, Barbara Streisand. Oh, and getting sexually aroused by men.

LinkWithin

Related Posts with Thumbnails